In my new series I tentatively call “Reviews?”, I review movies that I think are so predictable that I don’t need to see it. I did not see Pirates of the Caribbean. But here’s my review anyways.
This movie was okay. After Pirates 2 and 3, the franchise is headed in a new direction. Even though Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley are no longer in the series, they have been replaced by new supporting characters. The role of “witty sexual tension” gets passed off to Penelope Cruz. I laughed at the scene where she makes a sexual innuendo and she ends up saving him in sort of fight and he refuses to say thank you but smirks instead.
Barbossa, the former of villain, is now a sidekick of sorts. He is replacing Orlando Bloom as the “straight man” to Depp’s eccentric Jack Sparrow. I appreciated the scene where Sparrow does something unexpected and Barbossa sighs and has to go along with it, even though he clearly doesn’t agree.
I like that the zombies show up again, though the effects are sketchy. Ian McShane is the same as he is in every movie ever. He voiced the villain in Kung Fu Panda, that’s my favorite item on his resume. He is an okay villain but the spotlight went to (insert CGI monster(s) of some sort) which looked really cool but didn’t have enough screentime, though the trailers would make you think they were the star.
If you appreciate generic action adventure films, you’ll like “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides.” It has all the moments of zany humor while they’re escaping some peril and the great fight scenes where (insert normal average person) fights off (insert clearly trained or experienced warriors). There’s nothing special, but the ending definitely left it open for a possible sequel, or a new trilogy.
So, those of you that have seen it… Did I nail it or did I get it all wrong?